Poor Grandma, Part 2

Note: Just after I posted Poor Grandma, Part 1 I could not access, edit or otherwise even see my posts.  Mr. Steady was able to find & solve the problem for me...thank you, dear!

For Part 1, read here 

There are many modern conveniences, joys, and treats that I enjoy that "Grandma" never did.

For example, I thoroughly enjoy having a library tens of thousands of books a few blocks from my home.  I love that books are not as expensive as they once were and my boys can visit places all around the world through the stories they read.  If you've read this blog for any length of time you know how much I treasure books & reading.

I enjoy my running water, my shower, my washer & dryer - especially with all those cloth diapers, and my dishwasher.  I enjoy entertaining and hosting parties, it's fun to do something special for friends.  But do I do it because I want to bless my friends or do I do it so they will be impressed?  

"Grandma" was never able to keep in touch with so many friends and family through her computer.  "Grandma" was never able to hear sounds and songs from far away countries such as Kenya, Ireland, India, or Brazil.  Our world is so much bigger and more diverse than "Grandma"'s world ever was.  I'm so blessed to be able to email our friends in Kenya, Haiti and Norway - to see pictures of their children and to hear about their lives.

I enjoy looking at all the different and varied crafty projects available through Pinterest.  I am glad I don't have to make all of my families clothing or grow our own food.  I am glad I don't have to hitch up the horse and wagon every time I leave the house (although lately I'm thinking a horse would be more reliable!)

There is nothing inherently wrong with hosting dinner parties, painting your walls new colors or wanting your children's education to be more varied and diverse than your own.  But when we start comparing, judging, feeling discontent with our lives because of these things it just feels wrong. 

Please don't misunderstand, I am preaching to myself here - I want to serve God, love my family, love others, acknowledge my blessings, bless others - not out of the abundance of my blessings but bless others sacrificially.   I don't want to add more lists of things I must do, heaping rules and more unrealistic expectations on myself.

So because I was born for such a time as this, I will live in the moment, not pining for the past, not hoping for the future.  I will embrace the things that are useful to achieve His purposes for my life and chuck the things that bind. I will not question or judge how other people spend their time, their money, their resources.  I will not presume that because you do things differently that I am worse or you are better.  I will add beauty and peace to my life and discard misplaced expectations and appraisals.

My value is in Christ alone.  Am I pleasing Him?  Is this what He desires for me?  Is this how He desires I spend my time?  Is what I am feeling true, noble, lovely, pure....?  Dear Lord, keep my eyes focused on you & may my life and actions, decisions and words be pleasing and glorifying to You alone!

Poor Grandma, Part 1

Back when my "grandma" was raising children, she didn't know her arms were more toned than Mrs. Olsen's because they wore sleeves and didn't pin pictures of "6 Must-Do Exercises to Rid Your Arms of Flab Forever".  Nor did she have a full-length mirror (or the privacy to stand naked in front of one if she had one) to analyze just how bad her cellulite was.

And yet her husband loved her anyhow, delighted in her, and loved her faithfully until his last dying breath.

"Grandma" didn't realize there were "10 Things No New Mom Can Do Without", she thought her little stash of homemade cloth diapers and the wooden cradle that her husband made were just fine for bringing home another baby.  She didn't know she needed a Bumbo, a bouncer seat, a battery operated swing and a special bathtub.  On that note, she missed the list of "What to Pack in Your Hospital Bag" because she had homebirths and a kettle of hot water and a heap of clean towels was all she really needed.

And yet her baby's brains and bodies developed, they adored her and grew up healthy and strong.

"Grandma" didn't know there was 101 books she had to read to her children before they were six or that she had to prepackage busy bags for her younger children to play with while she educated her older children.  She didn't have to choose between 127 homeschool curricula, she just taught her children what she knew, how to read and write, how to add numbers, how plants grew, she taught the girls how to sew, cook and clean and shooed the boys out of the house to help their dad plant fields and do carpentry work or to manage the store or shoe horses.  The list of Date Night ideas escaped her notice and since there was no time to get away with just her &  the mister they surely also missed the "12 Mother-Son Dates" and "15 Daddy-Daughter Dates".

And yet her children knew they were loved and valued, were well educated, had good manners, made good friends and grew up to support their own families.

"Grandma" never found out what the words tablescape or gourmet meant.  Until they were older her girls shared a cup and most days if they had meat to eat it was a pretty special blessing.  She didn't fret over whether her grains were soaked and sprouted, the beef was grass-fed and their Omega 3s were in proper ratio to their Omega 6s.  She didn't stage her house when her husband said it was time to move, she just packed up everything they owned that would fit in the wagon and hoped the next person who found their cabin & made it home would appreciate the sturdiness of the bed.

And yet her family was well-fed and healthy, close-knit and called their mother "blessed".

"Grandma" never knew her rooms would seem bigger or her ceilings higher if she painted the walls a certain color.  She never knew her picture frames had to be hung a certain number of inches above her furniture or in odd numbers.

And yet her home always felt cozy, there was always warmth in the fireplace, and memories to savor.

"Grandma" never hosted grand tea parties for 12, made elaborate party favors for birthday parties, made seating charts for dinner parties or put mints on her overnight guests' pillows.

And yet her neighbors always knew they could stop in for a cup of tea, her friends always asked for her simple recipes, her church knew they could count on her to donate homemade pies, and her extended family didn't hesitate to spend the night when the weather was too bad to ride home.

Poor Grandma, she didn't know just how much of a mess she was.  She had no idea of her BMI or ideal weight, she didn't know how ill-prepared of a mom she was, she was unaware of how her children stacked up against other children in the state or country, she was incognizant about how simple and uninspiring her meals were, she was clueless about how unglamorous her home furnishings were, and she was simply oblivious to her entertaining faux pas.  And gloriously blissful in her ignorance.

As I talk to other ladies about their feelings of inadequacy, dissatisfaction with their lives, their marriages, their bodies, their houses, their children....their very purpose in life, I can't help but think of all the things "Grandma" missed out on. I am chief among the complainers.  I compare and covet.  I analyze and ache.  It's all just too much.  I agonize over comments made on Facebook, the lack of blog readers, I Pin every possible idea to help me feed, entertain, spend quality time with, impart value to my family.  I check out 10 books on the GAPS diet and vitamin deficiency along with 6 books on how to impart blessings to my family and make sure my children stay in church, and on top of that stack I add a few books on the proper colors for my home and the newest designs in home decor.  Many of these things are good things to think about, the food we feed our children, the coziness of our homes, the pleasures in life are not sins and may in fact be noble.  But the comparison game, the constant discontentment is just too much.  A little voice in my head screams "Enough!"  I want off of this ride of comparisons and inadequacy. 

And yet, I know that God put me here for such a time as this.  But He also calls me to come out and be separate.  Not to look like the world, to put my treasure in things not of this world, to find my value in Him, to let Him be God and be His servant.

(All pictures taken by Mr. Steady or myself at Sauder Village)

Ice Candle Part Deux

I know I've posted about my ice candle before but the directions were shabby at best and I thought to take pictures when I made it this last time.

Start with two containers, the larger one is about 2 gallons, if  I had to guess.  I think it was from GFS Marketplace and had potato salad or something similar.  The other container is about 48 ounces.  I have also used the metal insert from my ice cream maker as the middle.  If it is taller than your big container, that is fine...it just has to be smaller in diameter.

Start by filling your larger container with water.  Only fill it about 1/3-1/2 at first. 

 

 Put your smaller container in the middle and put something inside the small container to weight it down.  Your small container will probably shift off to the side if you don't weigh it down.  

You can see in this picture we chose to use a bag of split peas.  I should share with you that if you choose peas or beans of any sort and then accidentally drop your ice candle while it's in the freezer, there is a good chance your bag will crash and break and the bottom of your chest freezer will be covered in dried peas.  

Now you will need something to keep your middle container from popping up.  Mr. Steady used lots and lots of tape.  If your large container has a lid - that is the best.  After I made this I remembered I still had the lid.  Oops.

 

Now, just freeze until it's frozen solid.  When you're ready to use, add some warm water to the middle container to loosen it.  Add a candle in a container (I like to use a pillar candle in a canning jar) and set outside on your front porch.

If the weather is cold enough and your ice candle is still in good condition and pretty solid, you can bring it back inside each night and just refreeze.  I used this one four different times.  This really impressed my friend who saw it on several occasions but didn't realize I had taken it inside each time and stored it in the freezer between times :o) 

I am going to keep my eyes open for containers and maybe do a trio of smaller containers soon.

House Guests 201

As I shared yesterday, we recently hosted a family over the weekend and I want to share what & how I did, for my own future reference and also perhaps to help another reluctant host.  Today I'll share what I served for food.

For as many pictures as I had in the last post, this post is drastically missing any.  I didn't have an extra moment to snap pictures of any of our food.  All the pictures in this post are borrowed from the Internet.

I made up as much food ahead of time as possible.  I did not want to be in the kitchen all weekend and I definitely did not feel like I was.

For drinks, I made tea syrup from a recipe that Deborah shared with me.  Then I froze it in pint size servings, which make 1 gallon each.  I had a galvanized 1 gallon cooler with iced tea and a 2 gallon cooler with water available at all times.  We drink filtered water so over the month prior to their arrival, every time we emptied a gallon jug I rinsed it well, filled with filtered water and popped it in the freezer.  This way we didn't have to constantly refill the water filter or wait for filtered water.

 Source

In the mornings I made coffee and heated up hot water.  I laid out a variety of tea bags and a container of hot cocoa mix which was a huge hit with the children.

I had a meal planned for Friday evening but our company didn't arrive in time for dinner.  So Friday evening before we left for church I put the dessert, apple crisp, in the oven and put it on time bake so the house smelled so comforting and homey when we arrived home.  I served it hot with ice cream but the most delicious part of the snack was the fellowship!

Saturday breakfast: Sausage & egg casserole (I made the day before but I often make and freeze this as long as 2 months ahead of time), watermelon & cantaloupe, orange and apple juices, hot drinks

Saturday lunch: Grilled Chicken in the Crockpot (this is a recipe that Jill shared with me, it was so simple and so delicious) served with barbeque sauce, Corn on the Cob in the Cooler, Frozen Berry Cups (another recipe shared by Deborah...I feel like I should say this post was brought to you by the King girls, tee hee), Lemon Cake

Source

Grilled Chicken in the Crockpot
Chicken Breast (the recipe didn't specify amount, I used a double recipe of marinade for 5 pounds of tenderloins)
1/4 c butter 
1 c vinegar
1/8 c salt 
2 T water
1/2 t pepper 
1 t poultry seasoning
1 c b sugar.  

Boil all ingredients together, pour over chicken, marinade 2 hours.  Grill chicken for 5-10 minutes (chicken will NOT be cooked, I cooked tenderloins for 5 minutes since they are small).  You can freeze at this point.  Make a fresh batch of marinade WITHOUT the salt this time, thaw chicken, put chicken and fresh marinade in crockpot, cook on HIGH for 2 hours.

I was very leary of the amount of salt and vinegar in the marinade recipe but it was not overly salty (make sure to omit the salt from the second batch of marinade) and the vinegar really helped to make the meat tender.  Also the fat from the butter in the marinade helped the chicken to not stick to the grill.  This chicken was very tasty, tasted fresh off the grill but neither Mr. Steady nor I had to take time away from our guests to stand over a grill!

I was also not certain how the corn-in-the-cooler idea would work so I tried it out several days ahead of time.  You simply boil water, husk your corn and put it in a large cooler, pour the boiling water over it and let it sit for at least 30 minutes.  Mr. Steady was afraid it would ruin the cooler.  I used a different cooler each time (because of amounts) and both times I heard a distinct *pop* but neither cooler seemed damaged in any visible way.  I haven't used either one for cold items since but if I have a problem, I'll report back.  The first attempt I tried husked and non-husked corn.  Both cooked and tasted great but since we were serving a lot of children and you have to handle the corn hot if you cook it in the husk I decided to husk it ahead of time.  That's a great job for the children to do.  Make sure you rinse out & wash the cooler immediately because I read that it can get pretty funky pretty quick if you don't.

The family was at another home for supper Saturday night.

Saturday evening snacks:  Cheese & crackers, cookies

Sunday breakfast: Vanilla yogurt, homemade granola with a variety of stir-ins such as raisins, dried cranberries, and chocolate chips, zucchini bread (made ahead of time and froze), orange and apple juices, hot drinks.  I knew this meal might be more rushed as we attempted to get 15 people up, dressed, fed and out the door for church so I made it very simple and pretty much self-serve.

Sunday lunch was a carry-in at church

Sunday evening we had pizza and snacks at the church afterwards but I set out veggies and dip and zucchini bread for a snack before we headed out the door to church.

Source

Monday morning: Crockpot Egg Casserole, watermelon & cantaloupe, orange and apple juices, hot drinks.

I cannot find the link to the recipe I used for this but there are a lot of different recipes online for this idea.  I can tell you the basics.  It was 1 pound of cooked & crumbled bacon, 1 (32 oz) bag of frozen hash browns, 4 cups shredded cheese (I used a variety of sharp cheddar and co-jack), 12 eggs, 1 cup of milk, salt & pepper.  The recipe also suggested onions, peppers, and mushrooms but I omitted and stuck to the basics.  You start with your meat, then layer the hash browns and cheese, repeat layers to the top.  If you want to add veggies, layer those as well.  Then mix the eggs, milk and seasonings and pour over.  Cook on low for 8 hours.  This was so perfectly cooked and it served everybody with seconds plus Mr. Steady had a nice amount to take for his lunch.

I served all the meals buffet-style in the kitchen.  I used our regular dinner plates with disposable cups, napkins and silverware for each meal.  This way it was easy to keep up with dishes but we didn't create a huge amount of trash.  I bought some fun colored cups from GFS and had a lot of fun matching different napkins from my stash to the cups.  

House Guests 101

This post may seem pretty innocuous and straight forward, even basic and juvenile, for some of you.  You might entertain all the time and have overnight company twelve times a year.  But when Mr. Steady and I invited a family of 10 to stay for 3 nights with us recently, I wasn't sure exactly what to do.  I searched the Internet for ideas and suggestions on how to host house guests and found the results either quite shallow or overwhelming.  So I thought, for my own journaling purposes and record keeping, I would share what I did to prepare.

First off, a little background.  We have only had houseguests three times previously, we have hosted my mother-in-law twice and a pastor and his wife.  I had a lot of fears of inadequacy and insufficiency but I remembered the words of a mentoring friend who shared with me some time ago, "It's about hospitality, not entertaining".  Opening your home up to someone is not about impressing them, it's about loving them, sharing life with them, giving them a soft, warm place to sleep and food that comforts and sustains.

Dad & Mom and their youngest son (in a pack & play)slept in our room.  The Reader enjoyed putting Hershey's kisses on each pillow.  Because the family arrived late in the evening after church services, I made sure to turn on lamps before leaving the house for the night. 

 I also left a small gift (a package of pretty tissues, a notepad, special chocolates, and almonds) and a note on their bed, thanking them for visiting us.

 Because we have a limited number of towels (our family used beach towels for shower time), I laid out a towel for each guest so they would know which one was theirs.  I also filled a small basket with necessities that might have been forgotten.  I get free samples from different companies of shampoos, body washes, and other things and hold onto them for traveling. 

 I put fresh flowers on the night stands of all the ladies.  Mr. Steady picked up $12 worth of flowers from the grocery store and I was able to make 3 medium sized bouquets and 3 tiny bouquets for various places around the house.  Current reading materials were placed on the bottom shelf of our nightstands.

 This love seat is in our bedroom and I made it up for their youngest daughter to sleep on.  She ended up deciding she'd rather sleep with her sisters, which allowed her parents to have a private place to relax and Mom to nurse the baby.

 I tried to personalize each bed a little bit, putting out reading material that would suit each person.  I also tried to pick out a special blanket for each person.

The girls slept in the boys' bedroom.  Luckily we haven't done any decorating in this room so it's pretty neutral.  I spent some time at the library picking out books for young girls - I am not sure if they read them or not but I have been in places where I would have *loved* something to read.

 I took off the boys' blankets and replaced them with more feminine ones and put pretty flowered pillowcases on for the girls. 

 This picture cracks me up, I had a little more organization in mind for the boys, who slept on the floor of schoolroom.  But then I guess when you let them make their own beds - you get what you get.  The school table is where the children took their meals so the boys had to pile all of their blankets and pillows back into the blue totes every morning.  Then they pulled the table out, put the chairs around, and ate their meal.  Then, because this was also their play area, they had to put the table back and fold up the chairs until the next meal.  Not exactly ideal but I never heard anyone complain.

 This is the beautiful family that stayed with us, on their last morning.  They don't look too starving or tired, do they? :o)

I will post tomorrow about how I fed everybody!